Well, I’ve written a few blogs about what to take, and what to leave at home, but this blog is how to adapt to local ways and traditions.
- Foreign Currency. This is a must for those of you who don’t want to let your credit card catch on fire, each and every time you need some ready cash. If I wanted to see the exchange rate for converting Dollars to Pula then I’d probably visit http://www.xe.com I’m not certain if my journey down my Inner Ear will take me near Botswana, but just to be on the better-safe-than-sorry side, I thought that the Pula would get me farther in Gabarone, then if I only had dollars! If in the wilds of California, I happen to break down in an area where only Setswana is spoken, then a few Pulas together with a can or two of Chibuku, then I probably can get by to the next encampment along the Zambezi River.
- Acquainting oneself with the local politics. I’ve been away from California for many years, and as things progress here in Denmark, they must do so as well in California. During my years living in Europe, the Governor has gone from being one named Brown with Brown Hair, to an Austrian Actor, Arnold something-or-other, then onward to someone named, curiously enough, Brown again, just with Grey/or not very much hair.
- Local Customs. I wonder if Californians adhere to the same type of principles over there, as they do in Denmark? I’d really like to experience the customary binding people to telephone poles, and casting them down into the sea, but it might just require Atlantic Sea Water, instead of Pacific Sea Water for the full effect? It’s not unlike bobbing for apples at Halloween, but I believe the local name for it is really Robertting for apples! OK the Danes do get a bit carried away with that tradition, and some go as far as convincing the odd Norwegian or, Swede to participate, in the hope that they will sail back to where they came from, but it is all in good fun all the same!
- The Local Language. Some might think that English is the Lingua Franca in California, but other travelers have reported in recent times, that this information is quite incorrect for 2016. Spanish is widely spoken, as is any number of local languages in the greater metropolitan areas of California, but the true language of the Golden State is CalWorthingtonensis, which started out in Southern California, but which spread to the whole of the western USA. It takes a while to learn this special dialect, but after you get the hang of it, you’ll be able to sell automobiles, while flying on a crop-duster, tempting a tiger to eat a cookie, or riding a hippopotamus. **
- Clothes to Blend In with the local population. I have convinced myself that I’ll be able to fit in, while journeying down my Inner Ear, but not everyone has a natural talent like myself! Levis were once upon a time a “must” for everyone under age 30 (because if you were over age 30, you were considered over the hill), but times have changed and fashions too. I’d probably recommend a Cowboy hat with an American Flag pin on it, some bluejeans, the model depending on your age and political preferences (with an American Flag on it), a Budweiser Belt Buckle with an American Flag on it, and red and white socks, with blue shoes. I would like to see how the locals will be greeting your attire, as you stroll down Hollywood Blvd, eating a Winchell’s Donut (or perhaps just having a few Donut Holes * in your pocket), sipping a Coca Cola, while heading towards the local McDonalds.
*Donut Holes. http://www.dishmaps.com/doughnut-holes/2410
Just the sight of those Donut Holes is making my waistline expand, which means that his blog is at an end, lest I drown in the deep, deep lake called Nostalgia.
I only hope Wonder Dog is looking forward to his visit as much as me, with him also being able to experience California at its best***.